In a situation like the one I so very unfortunately found myself in with Cynthia Klever on July 9, 2015 at the downtown Seattle YMCA, I think the following six sentences may be very useful.
I'm not good at rote memory, so just choose any one (or two, if you can). In the midst of a possibly or likely upsetting encounter, it's going to be difficult probably to remember two, let allow six.
At the very least, commit to memory (6), which is the most neutral and gives no reason as to why you cannot and will not talk with this person under the current circumstances.
It requires both determination and courage to do this. It's not easy, at least not for me. But you have to believe that you can.
(1) I'm angry because I think you are distorting the truth.
(2) When I am not angry, I will be willing to discuss this matter with you again.
(3) You are being (very) disrespectful to me.
(4) I don't like being accused of things that are not true.
(5) If you continue behaving this, I will leave immediately.
Don't worry about having to repeat saying any one or more of these sentences as needed over and over again to each provocation. Remember, you came for a discussion, and you are not getting one from the other person.
Don't even bother responding to her questions at this point. It's not a give-and-take conversation at this point, if it ever was.
Her questions are purely rhetorical, accusations and/or blame in the guise of questions.
She's really just trying to goad you into losing your temper and saying something that she can then use against you.
(6) This is not a conversation or discussion I am willing to participate in.
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